vhf prose

Posted in Uncategorized, vhf by bowsprite on 2011/01/30

These lines were heard on various channels of  VHF (very high frequency) marine radio. Vessel names (where possible) and times were jotted in sketchbook margins or envelopes. All tugs have been changed to protect the innocent. or guilty.

“Coming to you as quick as my little propellers will take me.”

“We’re standing by, and we’ll keep knocking the fish outta the water until you get by.”

vessel 1: “Cap—you hanging out here?”
vessel 2: “No, this is my warp speed, believe it or not. You go ahead, I’ll take your stern.”

vessel X: “Oh, Yooooohoooo!”
vessel Y:  “Yeeeeeep?”
vessel X: “I gotta go move the buddha, so I’ll be right back.”
vessel Y: “Ok.”
vessel X: “And he’s gonna move it boat style, not boom style.”
vessel Y: “As long as he don’t get used to it.”

Ah! translation in the comments section! thank you, Yooohoooo!

vessel A (very cheerfully): “That you, Stupid?”
vessel B (equally cheerfully): “Cheeeeck!”
vessel A (in cartoon voice): “I’ll gitchoo…!”

middle of the night, buddy 1: “Look at at that moon!”
buddy 2: “Ah! I forgot what it’s like to do oil.”
buddy 1: “You still smoking?”
buddy 2: “Ha ha…well…I quit today. But I think I’ll go back now that you mention it.”


My absolute favorite VHF moment is here, “Are you angry?”

13 Responses

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  1. […] I do like this color.  And for more delightful colors, check out bowsprite’s latest hues.  The first tug . . . hmmm, what company is running the avocado […]

  2. o docker said, on 2011/01/30 at 20:42

    It was once said of Ansel Adams that he photographed rocks as if they were people.

    It occurs to me that you paint boats the same way.

    I think it’s not so much the line or the color, as the attitude that talks to me.

    And I swear I haven’t been drinking.

  3. Baydog said, on 2011/01/30 at 23:38

    Comments on this post should now be officially closed after reading the first one.
    And I have been drinking. But that’s beside the point.

  4. Buck said, on 2011/01/31 at 12:06

    O Docker, yes!

  5. […] at least once before;  since that link mentions vhf chatter, you must see bowsprite’s latest creations and transcriptions.   Maria J was quickly overtaken by the three […]

  6. […] hears and transcribes memorable quotes from VHF chatter on the sixth boro;  I need to upgrade my radio before I get such plums.  So I’ll […]

  7. Mage Bailey said, on 2011/02/02 at 17:40

    Delightful. You are the only person who brings this kind of magic to our ears. Both entries. “Are you angry,” indeed. We have so little in or out now, that I am ashamed to mention that I live in a port town.

  8. Michael said, on 2011/02/03 at 10:47

    You have to love the guy who responds to “is that you, stupid”? I would certainly perk up.

    I have a mighty thirst.

  9. BM1 said, on 2011/02/15 at 08:07

    The “Yoooohhhhooooo” comment Translation.
    Buddha is the Mate’s nickname on the dredge. He the dredge needs to be straightened up, usually they just use the crane and the bucket but in this case the couldn’t because of the tide they needed a boat. I was the Yooohooo.

    • bowsprite said, on 2011/02/15 at 10:04

      wow! is that you?? I caught your name and I am very happy for the translation! thank you!!!

  10. kim carver said, on 2011/05/03 at 21:25

    Cruiser 1: vessel at (so and so) coordinates, this is (Cruiser 1), between you and shore. You just crossed my bow and radar shows we are now on the same track, but I’m confused because I still see your port running light.

    Other Vessel: yes well our starboard light cover broke but we fixed it with some red tape.

    Cruiser A: cruiser b! You need to fall off! We are on two parallel courses that are about to converge!

  11. […] possibly write about this topic without first referencing Bowsprite’s prior posts here and here. Not only did she accurately (and highly entertainingly) capture the lingo, her whimsical […]

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